its been a while
Posted by jejepp el waseem Saturday, August 6, 2011 at 8/06/2011 11:29:00 PM
What Does “I Love You” Mean?
Posted by jejepp el waseem Wednesday, February 3, 2010 at 2/03/2010 08:51:00 PM
It is not enough to tell someone you love them on a regular basis if there is no passion and fire behind the statement. We often say the words, “I love you” without really feeling the meaning of them. Yeah we know the words mean, ”You matter to me… I care about what happens to you…. I think you’re pretty cool.” But there is so much more to it then that. When we are first falling in love, we think about the ideas of what that means. We analyze the relationship and each other. We really look at what is developing and we evaluate whether or not it is safe to say those three little words. It is a big deal to make the decision to say it to someone else. How will they receive it? Do they feel the same way? Will they say, “I love you, too” or will they mumble something about having a meeting they forgot about? After the relationship is going along successfully, we forget to really think about what it means to still be saying, “I love you” to the other person.
Here’s an exercise for you that should help you rediscover what it means to say those words to someone. Think about tone and voice inflection. You can change the meaning of a sentence by which word you give extra punch to. “I love you” is different from “I love you” which is also different from “I love you.” Let’s look at each version separately.
When we say it as “I love you” one is reminded of when someone is depressed and thinks that nobody cares about them. We let the person know they are wrong by letting them know we want to be seen as the exception to that belief system. But take it a step further…. Who are you? What does it mean when YOU are the one saying that you love someone else. What does that entail? Who exactly is loving them?
When we say it as “I love you” then it means more then just “I like you” or “I want you” or “I admire you.” What does the word love mean to you? Are you using the right word? Maybe you really should be saying “I care about you” or “I love how I feel when I’m around you” or “I think you’re amazing.” Sometimes we just cluster a whole bunch of positive emotions together and put them under the umbrella word – love. So take some time and think about what that word means to you and how it is used.
When we say it as “I love you,” what comes to mind is someone being accused of wanting someone else and they adamantly reply, “No! I love YOU!” For this portion of the exercise, think about who it is you say those words to. Who are they really? Are they the same person today as they were when you first started saying it? If you met them on the street for the first time today, as they are now, would you still fall in love with them all over again? Do you still see them for who and what they are deep down inside or are you just saying the words to a memory of who they were when you first met them?
Finally, blend all of these concepts together in your mind. When you tell your partner that you love them, what is it you’re saying in it’s biggest fullest sense? Now write it all down. “I love you means….” You may only have one or two sentences or you may have pages and pages of words describing what it means for you to love that person. It is not important how much you have written, but that you have now reconnected yourself with the root of what it is the words “I love you” means to you. When you say it to your partner, you will say it with real passion and fire again because the meaning will be fresh in your mind. You won’t be simply repeating it on autopilot like so many of us do. Perhaps you will add a passionate kiss and even tell them about this exercise and what came to mind as you contemplated what it means to love them.
You could even ask your partner, “So tell me, what does it mean to you when you say the words, ‘I love you’ to me?” Give them time to think through their answers. Don’t pressure them. It’s a lot like the first time you tell someone that you love them…. you still have to put yourself out there and wait for the honest openhearted response that they give you. Just like with a new relationship, you can’t yell at them for not responding correctly or start nagging about how they ought to be more in touch with their feelings – especially their feelings about you. Perhaps it would be better to agree that you will each take pen and paper and spend some time alone thinking through what you would like to say to the other. Maybe you are both open enough to sit cuddled together on the sofa and share the free flowing thoughts that come to mind as you contemplate together what “I love you” means to you at this stage of your life together. The worst thing you can do is make it like a pop quiz in school where your partner feels like a big fight is going to occur if they don’t answer it correctly and in a timely manner.
Another idea you could try is to write out your own thoughts about what it means to love your partner in your best handwriting and leave it for them as a love letter somewhere that you are sure they will find it. Even if they do not do the same for you, you may still find a deeper more meaningful response from them the next time you tell them those three magical words.
5 feedback Labels: love
byebye dua ratus dan sembilan dan hye doploh saploh
Posted by jejepp el waseem Tuesday, December 29, 2009 at 12/29/2009 05:38:00 PM
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.. lame gile tak hupdate blog niyh..bersarang gile...sorisori jepp ucapkan yer.. jepp malas nk update blog dowh since jadi FB-addict niyh..huhu... papepon jepp mahu ucapkan selamat tinggal kepada 2009 walaupon bukan hari ni kita berpisah dan hello my new year friend! jepp nak berkawan baiklah ngan 2010. kepada anda 2010 saya dah bersiap bermacam perkara untuk bersama anda. jadi harap sangat anda boleh jadi kawan baik saya ye.. :)
jepp dah ubah kedudukan bilik, imej jepp, azam jepp, even yang the best is kekasih jepp. hope 2010 berkelakuan baik ngan jepp. sure jepp berkelakuan baik ngan 2010. lagipon pada jan 2010 ni jepp akan mulekan perniagaan hope 2010 membantu yer..
oh lupe nk btaw kawankawan. datanglah perfectly refined studio kt seksyen 7 shah alam. jepp baru mulakan perniagaan kecil-kecilan iaitu saloon studio dan wedding & event planner. harapan jepp kepada kawankawan agar supportlah jepp yer.
13 feedback Labels: new year., Perfectly refined
Posted by jejepp el waseem Thursday, September 10, 2009 at 9/10/2009 06:11:00 AM
lama rasanya jepp tak bercerita kt blog kesayangan jepp ney..this entry jepp tujukan kepada semua kawankawan jepp yang tinggal di apartment perdana block 4 tingkat 1 bernombor rumah 2-01. kawankawan saat mula pertemuan aku dan kamu ialah ketika kita dipertemukan oleh yuni sahabat yang mana aku berjumpa ketika sedang bermain bersama ular aku.
terima kasih Yuni kerana perkenalkan diorang kt jepp..saat dimana jepp memerlukan teman ntuk bergembira dan menghilangkn luka hati ini.
kemudian datanglah beberapa kawankawan Yuni yang lain..jepp tak berapa nk egt siapa makhluk yang kedua itu..baby atau miloxeto..haha die ni comel..tak sangka lak jepp penah sekelas ngn die..sorry i tak perasaan u b4..but atleast we're friends now rite..gua takkan lupe lu beb! hahaha..baby ko selalu wat aku terasa ingin gelak..gay petuturan yang menghiburkan...best jugak kawan ngan ko ni...jgn lupe aku suda...wa hentak lu nanti..haha..
shahzali a.k.a kiddo..cam dropdead da aku nengok pic ko..^-^
que sorry aku tak dapat cari pic ko..hehehe..maaf yer..ampun...
9 feedback Labels: friendship, meaningful, memory
happy birthday sayang
Posted by jejepp el waseem Tuesday, July 28, 2009 at 7/28/2009 07:18:00 PM
with some riddle that i gave u, just only to let u get ur simple love shaped origami that i made by my bare hand, i hope u enjoy playing the riddle and keep the love shaped origami my love.
to be honest, i've never seen u smile so much and unstoppable, u keep smiling and thanking me to be ur lover and everything, it makes me thinking either, i dont want to lose u, indeed i love u so much.
here i've inserted the "happy birthday song" for u..
happy birthday to my sayang...
happy birthday to you..
my baby love was born on 26 julai 198+
sayang da tua...
4 feedback Labels: birthday, mysayang